Scrambled Craigs

How can we accurately describe our quartet? Possibly by quoting a couple of lines from our theme song, "Scrambled Craigs":

Who came up with the name Scrambled Craigs?
If you find out will you break his legs.

In 1996, a Barbershop-crazy teenage  tenor desperately wanted to perform in a quartet on the annual West Towns Christmas Show. Who could predict that his efforts would deteriorate into what is now Scrambled Craigs. He found three sympathetic (emphasis on pathetic) singers, (Craig, Craig, and Joe) and we unofficially became  the quartet "Contributing to the Delinquency of a Minor."

Like most new quartets, we focused on getting our notes and words precise and smooth. We soon discovered that rehearsals were much more fun when we screwed up the notes or twisted  the words. Therein lies the secret of Scrambled Craigs' mediocre success.  Our quartet is unencumbered by proper techniques for vocal production,  allowing us to approach any song with a creative and indifferent ear.

Scrambled Craigs has performed in each of the last six West Towns Christmas Shows and we have become an audience favorite (despite our best efforts). One would think that we would have gotten better over those years. Actually, we have just gotten older.

Encouraged by our Christmas performance  experience, we have decided to branch out.

Call us. We can deliver a performance  that you will always remember.

Members:

Craig Lancaster, Lead: Craig has been a Barbershop singer for  many years. He sings bass in the West Towns Chorus so he prefers being  know as a "blead." (Part bass and part lead. It makes more sense  than being called a "lass"). Craig is one of the chief instigators  of parody within the quartet. When he is not contemplating how to take a musical performance to new lows, he finds time to manage the quartet.

Jim Jarosz, Tenor: Jim, possibly our tenor, is a long-time Barbershop singer. He recently joined the quartet and the West Towns Chorus. That puzzled look on his face tells you that Jim has yet to figure out what he has gotten himself into. He derives his major enjoyment in the quartet from standing next to Craig (the blead) because it makes him look and feel slimmer. Jim brings three wildly unique characteristics to the quartet -  he has a wife; he has three kids; none of the kids is named Craig. When he's not in our chorus or quartet, Jim is in twelve other choruses and nine quartets. He has not slept since 1991.

Joe Tomecek, Baritone: Joe is also a Barbershop veteran. In fact, he is a second generation Barbershop singer. He takes after his mother. In his chorus incarnation, he teaches stage presence (SP) and choreography. In the quartet, Joe doesn't move  at all. As a disgruntled baritone, upset over never being heard, Joe contributes some of the parodies and de-arrangements of the quartet's songs.

Craig Ahlgrim, Bass: Craig is not related to the other Craig even though their names are similar. Craig has Barbershop in his blood, for which he is currently on medication. Being a third generation barbershopper, he really had no choice in the matter. He is known within the chorus as a tag teacher and frequently scrambles the tags the quartet sings.  Craig thinks he is a major asset to the quartet because of his great vocal techniques, his incredible good looks and charming personality. In reality, he was only needed for his first name, but don't tell him that: he may cry. He was recently overheard explaining why he was late to a performance by saying, "I spent an hour on my hair. Then I forgot to bring it."

If you still want us to sing for you, please get in touch with a Craig, preferably Lancaster.